Ok this is going to be a VERY brief introduction because I want to save the main one for when I figure out how to upload a photo which I currently have NO idea how to do.

Basically my Name is Chris, I go to Keyano Cokkege in Fort Mcmuarry Alberta, been here two years, and after I get out of college I hope to become either a broadcaster or to open my own business up here, leaning towards a restaruant.

Thats all the intro you get for now because as I said I have a question that needs answering. The question is this am I in the "friend zone" or does she want more?

here is the situation.


OK so I am in college and I have my eye on 2 girls 1 that I have wanted to get with for about 8 months and the 2nd is one of my best friends in the college and I NEVER wanted to become attracted to her. The problem is EVERY time we speak she ALWAYS tells me how "sweet" I am, how "nice" I am, how I am "such a wonderful person" and how I am " the only truly deacnt guy in this town" (I mean she says stuff like this ALL the time, EVERY time we see or talk to each other)

essentally according to this girl I am a saint. (I have tried to explain that I am not but it doesn't work lo she sees something in me I just don't see.l)


and the more time we spend together, the more she speaks the more I realize that she means EVERY damn word she says and the more attracted to her I get. I NEVER wanted to become attracted to her and thats the truth, the only thing I ever expected or wanted is what we have now, which is a level of trust that allows us to tell each other ANYTHING to the point where I gave her my number and told her if she ever wanted to talk about ANYTHING no matter what time it was, even at 4 am all she had to do was call and I meant that.

Now I know that This girl holds me in HIGH regard and I am 99.9% sure if I asked her out she'd jump at that chance because as said before she TRULY believes that I am the nicest sweetest guy on planet earth.

Now I need to know from people from experience is it worth it? is dating friends a good idea? I mean honestly I can see it working for 3-4 years but then what happens if we broke up? that level of trust would be damaged and thats not something that I want to risk.


not sure what to do, so ladies please help cause I am REALLY confused and don't know what to do right now.


I am by no means a player and even if I could date both these girls at the same time the chances of me doing it would be almost non existant.

so ladies does it sound like the "friend zone" or does it sound like she wants more?

to be honest I am kinda hoping for the friend zone just because we do get along great and dating her would be a big risk.

That is a really hard situation. I really think that losing a friendship is not worth it if you don't see it lasting. If you are only attracted to the friend because she says sweet things about you then I would probably just keep it as a friendship.

You have to think about if you are willing to give up the friendship and go into something that you know will have a huge impact on the relationship you have already spent years trying to build up.

It sounds like she wants you but because she is so in awe of you that could cause a completely new set of problems. If you start dateing her, will she get really clingy and over protective?

Like they say Honnesty is always key. Based on reading you're description of you're situation seems like you're into her because of highly she thinks of you. Have you attempted to talk to her about where you guys stand? Maybe that will be great place to start. No matter what i would advize you to always be honnest about you're emotions no matter then outcome. R u into this girl or the girl you have been eyeing for 8 mnths?If you're into her and love the person she is.. then why not. But if you're going based on the compliments she feeds you then dnt. Its not all about you it whats best for the best of you. The best you can do is talk to her about it.. who knos what the outcome will be. Friends specially good ones are very hard to find!

[quote="amb05"]That is a really hard situation. I really think that losing a friendship is not worth it if you don't see it lasting. If you are only attracted to the friend because she says sweet things about you then I would probably just keep it as a friendship.

You have to think about if you are willing to give up the friendship and go into something that you know will have a huge impact on the relationship you have already spent years trying to build up.

It sounds like she wants you but because she is so in awe of you that could cause a completely new set of problems. If you start dateing her, will she get really clingy and over protective?[/quote

I hope not, I hope she'd trust me more then that and I think she would. If your right and she is in awe of me I know EXACTLY where it likely started.

See the Girl I had my eye on orginally was about 20-21 years old and with a 2 year old baby girl, and unlike most guys I wasn't bother by that AT ALL. I think my friend saw that and if your right and she has fallen for me THATS where it likely started because I was willing to accept the fact that their was a kid involved if it meant getting to know the first girl. I think my friend noticed that and thats where it began.

she always knew about the first girl and always thought it was "so sweet" that I was willing to potenially get into a relationship where a kid was involved.

and when I asked the frst girl out and she found out how I did it, she said "I have NEVER heard any girl be asked out the way you did it, it was the sweetest thing I have EVER heard. for the record when I did it I was given EVERY indication I had the date.

When it didn't happen my friend look at me and said " I can't belueve she never gave you an nswer your so nice and sweet and ginuwine"

My friend knew that I didn't do what I did with the first girl to get laid she knew I asked her out cause I wanted to get to know HER wither the kid was there or not. after all this took place she said "you know Chris, I knew from day 1 that we met, I knew you weren't bullshit, you have a realness to your personality thats very rare"

to be quite honest, id ask her straight up what she thought. if you are that open with her and you can say anything to eachother why not just ask her what she wants to see happen between the two of you.

i have dated a best friend and i dont have any means of contact with them anymore. its really a choice you have to make. maybe have some kind of promises that you'll always stay connected no matter what the case.

cheers! and goodluck!
kayla